This week’s chapter is dedicated to Dennis…
When they were finished, Gail, Novak, Henry and the nearly catatonic Sarah ventured outside, where Earl was waiting for them. The fungoid man-thing lurched forward, arms outstretched. Supporting Sarah’s dead weight, Henry barely dodged Earl’s attack. Seven more of the creatures lumbered up the stairs.
“What do we do?” Gail shouted.
“Do?” Novak un-holstered his flamethrower and tossed it over the side. It crashed onto the landing far below.
Gail and Henry gaped at him, speechless.
“Do?” He repeated. “Why, we do the only thing we can do! We sing!”
He grabbed Gail by the arm, spun her around, and began an elaborate dance routine.
“Oooooooooklahoma, where the wind comes sweepin’ down the plain. And the wavin’ wheat can sure smell sweet. When the wind comes right behind the rain.”
And then Leviathan showed up and bit their heads off with his multi-mouthed tentacles. And it was all your fault, Dennis. Because rather than let things develop organically, you demanded I rush a chapter out, and this is what happened. Are you happy now?
The real next chapter of Deluge will debut next Friday, June 3
I only have one think to say about that. HAHAHAHAHA!
Brian rules..
So great to start my day with a smile. Absolutely hilarious. Thanks Brian. Brian Keene = Comedian.
Awesome ~ Thanks Brian (and I guess thanks to Dennis, too… dumbass)
ah good, now that this free book is done i command you begin another post haste and drop everything that gives your life meaning
i am from the internet so do my bidding!
Hahaha…fantastic!
My Welsh friend would call you a Wanker for this tease…lol!
I had a mini heart attack then a good laugh…you rock Bro
Wrong!
The weather should’ve broke, and everyone joined hands to sing Rainbow Connection.
After that they all get raptured, and some guy in a janitor’s jumpsuit shuffles by pushing a mop who turns out to be Jesus. He gives a thumbs up then waves buh-bye.
LOL… Could of had Dennis show up before Leviathan ,that way Dennis could have got his head bit off too!!!
Brother Odd beat me to it!!!
Great job, Brian.
I totally hope thats in the extra’s when its finnally released in book form.
LOL… That made my Friday!!
Loved it!
LOL!! You are the best Brian!
TOO SHORT………
Why are there so many songs about rainbows? And what’s on the other side?
Taser-wielding Magic Unicorns of course!
Have a great weekend everyone.
((Hugs))
Oh my god, i think that was the funniest thing i’ve ever read. I seriously laughed so hard. Brian you are the man.
Sweet! LOL
HAHAHA That made my day. Awesome ‘chapter’ Brian.
Hahahaha… Classic!
HILARIOUS!! I think Novak should use the flamethrower on Dennis the Menace!!
Came to your website today, quickly glanced at the header, “Deluged (Part 74) – Not (in my exuberance, I really did not take note of the “Not” part) and rabidly started reading. My reaction at first was — What in the unholy Hell is this!? It was the next second that my brain kicked in and whispered, “Psst… Mike, you fuckin’ idiot, Keene is havin’ a go at Dennis” (yes, I have conversations with myself — no you don’t — yes, I do — shut up!!). Um… sorry about that — where was I? Oh… after I realized my stupidity, I started over and really enjoyed this fun departure. Also, I agree with Chrissy K, you should have had Novak take out Dennis The Menace with flamethrower. Anyway, a fun read. “Oooooooooklahoma”… shit, now I’ll have that song in my head all day long — no you won’t — yes, I will — wait, arrrggghh!!!! DAMN the voices!!!
LOLS
Amazing!!!
Dennis ruins everything. >:| Screw that guy. I’m going back to reading Doctor Who fan fiction :p
Dennis, your such a dick!
Haha! Yes, I agree that should be an extra when the print edition is released!
The fanboy bullshit just doesn’t stop!